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Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Paris On Her Back Since Ten Am

Paris Hilton just tweeted she's been in back to back business meetings since 10am. If that was me, and I was Paris, I would hire someone else to do my tweeting. She obviously meant to say been on my back since 10am giving someone the business. 

Robot Balls Are Coming Soon

Robot Balls are coming to a store near you. I know what your thinking, you didn't even know robots had balls. They are not what you think, actually they are little robotic balls you can control with your IPhone. They will be distributed by Gearbox and are sure to be a hit with cat lovers. If that was me, I would actually develope robotic balls that could be implanted in men and controlled by their signifigant other's IPhone. There would be alot more customers for that than cat owners.

Michael Bolton Wants Apology

Michael Bolton wants an apology from the judge that criticized his performance on ABC's Dancing With The Stars . When are we gonna get an apology for his "music". If that was me, I would go back to karaoke, Michael.

Howard Stern Has Bed Bugs

Howard Stern's office has been invaded by bed bugs. Who would of thought with all the dirty ho's that have been through there it would be bed bugs. If that was me, I'd try to book Lindsay as soon as she gets out. Crabs kill bed bugs don't they?

Monday, September 27, 2010

Blogs Of Note, Where Are They All?

Just about every day I click on the Blogs of Note section on Blogger and see almost always the same blogs. Don't get me wrong I have discovered some really great blogs there, but there must be more. If that was me, I would put more effort into updating it daily. There are many people out there writing some great stuff and I would like to see it.

Taylor Swift To Replace Lohan

The writer of a new film One Night With You, originally written with Lindsay Lohan in mind, is reportedly considering replacing her with Taylor Swift. Talk about one extreme to another. If that was me, and I was in charge of this film set I would make sure no one accidently gave Taylor Lindsay's trailer. NO Taylor that's not sugar!

Segway Owner Dies As Segway Goes Off Cliff

In a tragic accident earlier today, the iowner of the Segway company died when the Segway he was operating went over a cliff. What's next an iPad explodes in the face of Steve Jobs? If that was me, I would get out of the office for a while Steve. Just don't take a Segway.

Saturday, September 25, 2010

Jersey Shore Sammy Blows Off Diddy

Sammy of Jersey Shore fame was recently outside a club in LA when Diddy pulled up and called out to her. She supposedly blew him off. What has the world come to when a reality "star" snubs Diddy. If that was me, and I was Diddy, I would start working out, drinking heavily, and learn that fist pump. Don't you know you need to scream I don't need you bitch, to get her attention.

Judge Judy Wants Lohan In Jail

Judge Judy has spoke up on the whole Lindsay Lohan mess, and she feels the actress should be in jail. I agree, while I don't think this will fix her addiction, she has broken the law repeatedly. If that was me, I would of still been in from my first offense.

Hillary Duff Has A 7 Million Dollar House?

According to Perez Hilton, Hillary Duff has her house for sale for 7 million dollars. How does Hillary Duff have a house worth that much? If that was me, I'd start putting away some of that money. I don't think a career of Lifetime films pay that well. 

Friday, September 24, 2010

Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan Tackle The Deficit

Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan Tackle The Deficit

Facebook Owner Donates 100 Million

The owner of Facebook Mark Zuckerberg will announce today on Oprah, he will be donating 100 million dollars to the Newark NJ school system. Let's hope this money really goes to the kids. If that was me ,I would spread the wealth around. No doubt there are plenty of other needy schools. I just think you give that much to one school system there is gonna be alot of waste.

Thursday, September 23, 2010

E! Set To Launch Bridalplasty

The E! network is set to air a new show called Bridalplasty, which features a dozen bride to be's competing for massive plastic surgery. The show is hosted by Shanna Moaker, a former Miss USA. So put a beautiful woman as host of a show filled with women already insecure about their looks. C'mon E! have a heart. If that was me I would make Joan Rivers the host, and let these women really think about what they want to do. 

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Braylon Edwards Busted For Drunk Driving

Braylon Edwards of the NY Jets was arrested early this morning and charged with driving under the influence. He supposedly was at twice the legal limit. I believe the law in NY will require him to install a breathlyzer device in any vechicle he owns if he is convicted. I would bet he can find someone to blow in the device for him, yet amazingly he couldn't find anyone to drive him home. If that was me, and I was the judge, I would require him to have a MADD member with him any time he wanted to go out. 

Monday, September 20, 2010

J Wow To Appear In Playboy

According to the site Celebitchy J Wow from The Jersey Shore is going to appear in Playboy. They have pictures on their site of her in a bikini, and while I have seen worse she doesn't look like Playboy material to me. If that was me, and I was J Wow, I would probably do the same. They will airbrush her to look amazing ,and of all the cast, it seems her fame is fading the fastest.

Russell Brand May Lose Visa

According to Perez Hilton, Russell Brand may lose his visa for his recent arrest. We all know this will never happen. People that famous don't do the time for the crime. If that was me, I would certainly lose my visa and I'm alot more talented than him. Aren't we all ! I say send him back.

Situation Set To Earn 5 Million

Mike "The Situation" supposedly has projects in the works that could earn him upwards of 5 million dollars this year. This guy has to have the same agent or people as Britney Spears. How else do you explain two people with absolutely no talent, making this much money. If that was me, and I was "The Situation", I would bank as much as I can now, looks only last so long. Of course there is always, Survivor, or The Biggest Loser. Thank goodness for reality tv, right Mike ?

Paris Hilton Pleads Guilty Again !

Paris Hilton, according to The Associated Press has pleaded guilty to two misdemeanor charges, related to her having cocaine in her purse last month. She gets a year of probation, must complete a drug abuse program, pay a $2000 fine and serve 200 hours of community service. I believe the police found a gram of cocaine on her. If that was me, I would still be in jail trying to raise bail money, and would be facing years in prison. Guess I need to become more famous, get a new lawyer, or both. Better yet, I'll stay away from drugs. And Paris Hilton!

Sunday, September 19, 2010

Lindsay Lohan Fails Drug Test

As reported in US MAGAZINE Lindsay Lohan tweeted on friday night that she had failed her drug test. I had posted previously that I thought I knew the real problem with Lindsay and her brain's lack of ability to recognize the word STOP. If that was me, and I was her people, I would hire me to help her What could it hurt I couldn't make her any worse, and at the very least I could probably get a great book deal after only a week. 

Randy Quaid Arrested For Squatting

In a story reported on OMG Randy Quaid and his wife were arrested for squatting in the guest house of their former home. They were charged with burglary and causing $5000 in damage. If that was me, and I was Randy Quaid, I would get in touch with Chevy Chase. He obviously has another idea for a movie, talk about art, if you can call a Chevy Chase movie that, imitating life.

Great Blog About Blogs

I checked out another great blog today.The Bexter Review is the most helpful blog I've found in regards to sharing insider tips both in text and video form. I have read many books on blogging, as I am new to all this, and found more information in a few minutes than I had in weeks elsewhere. The author is doing a great job of helping the lost like me, if that was me, I would keep up the good work. Rewards are not far off.

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

Dell Customer Service Meets It's Match

I just found a blog Scotts Tip of The Day that is so funny. He details his problems with his Dell laptop computer and his frustration with their customer service. If that was me, and I  had this much trouble, for this long of a time, I would of thrown it in the Delaware River by now. But, I have to say it did provide us with one of the funniest blogs I've ever seen.

Saturday, September 11, 2010

Kanye West Apologizes To Taylor Swift

According to Rebecca Macatee at Kayne West has apologized through Twitter to Taylor Swift, and has even written a song for her. Rebecca questions whether he is sincerely sorry or just looking for publicity. I say neither, I think he's looking for a new market, and what's hotter than country right now. If that was me, and I was Kayne West, I would think twice about jumping on stage again. Cowboys were famous for carrying guns long before rappers.

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

President Obama Wants To Spend 50 Billion More On Infrastructure

President Obama wants to put another 50 billion dollars into the country's infrastructure, supposedly to create more jobs. I don't think this has anything to do with creating jobs, he's never in Washington. I think he just wants better roads to do all his travelling on. If that was me, and I was Obama, I would use a taxi, travel by Amtrak, and fly commercial. He could personally improve the economy with all his trips to The View, Oprah, Leno, etc.

Kat Von D Dumps Jesse James

Kat Von D has supposedly dumped Jesse James already. If that was me, and I was Kat, I would count my blessings she got out that fast ! Sure would be easier than counting her own tatoos.

Tuesday, September 7, 2010

New World's Shortest Man

Columbian Edward Nino Hernandez has just been named the world's shortest man at 2 feet 3 inches tall ? While I see some definite advantages from his point of view, if that was me I'd stay away from Weight Watchers meetings. First of all the view won't be great, secondly I don't know if he would end up being a snack or something on the bottom of a shoe.

Hulk Hogan Back Lands Him In Hospital

 Hulk Hogan has been hospitalized in Florida with severe back pain. Guess you can't have a wrestling career and a younger woman in your life at the same time. If that was me, I would stick with the wrestling, that's got to be less painful than what the last blonde in his life did to him.

Wednesday, September 1, 2010

Teen Shocks Own Nipple, Blames School

An 18 year old New Hampshire student, who attached an alligator clip with 90 volts of current, to his own nipple has brought a suit against his school. The shock may have caused brain damage. I'm no lawyer, but if that was me I think I would have a pretty good case of this kid being brain damaged long before he ever tried this stunt.

Gunman Unhappy With Programming At Discovery Channel

A gunman who held three people hostage, at the offices of The Discovery Channel, and who was later shot dead by police, had a dispute with the channel over programming. Of all the bad programming out there the guy had a problem with The Discovery Channel ? Who's next ? MTV, FOX,BRAVO, if that was me I'd start beefing up security now. How long before a crazed husband comes looking for the creators of all those Housewives shows?